Some people tune in to the Super Bowl for the football. (Sorry—tennis and basketball have my heart.) For me [Editor's note: And for the rest of the world that's not the US], America's largest sporting event is all about the commercials and trailers. The questions [...] have nothing to do with quarterbacks, betting odds, or even Taylor Swift. I just want to know who will eat the new Doritos flavour, OK? Also: which celebrity will talk to to the E-TRADE baby. One more: which former athlete (probably Gronk) will sing on top of a pool full of White Claw.
This year's slate of commercials features brand and celebrity partnerships so outrageous that they seem selected by a randomiser. Chris Pratt grows out his Super Mario moustache for Pringles, Eric André tries to pass through airport security with a bag full of Drumstick ice cream, Dan Marino reps both Michelob ULTRA and M&M's, and the Beckhams promote the big "baseball game" for Uber Eats. We're off to a great start.
Here's a rundown of the best commercials we've seen so far.
Super Bowl halftime performer Usher and actor Christopher Walken feature in a new BMW ad titled, "Talkin Like Walken." In the commercial, everyone is doing Christopher Walken impressions. "Don't you got somewhere to be?" a frustrated Walken asks Usher.
This year, LL Cool J is the conductor of the—wait for it—"Chill Train," for Coors Light. Apparently, he's delivering chill vibes across the country. Recent Grammy winner Lainey Wilson also makes an appearance in the ad.
The Scrubs duo sing to Jason Momoa about the wonders of T-Mobile cable in a new commercial for the home cable and internet provider. Naturally, Momoa shows them up with his own singing skills.
"What if one of the biggest moves of Super Bowl Sunday was taxes?" asks Abbott Elementary's Quinta Brunson. The ad—where we'll presumably hear the answer—is directed by Taika Waititi.
I'm not going to lie: I did think there was a "T" in Skechers. Either way, now there is... sort of. Mr T is here, people, and he loves the new slip-on Skechers. "I pity the fool that has to touch his shoes to put them on," he says.
[Editor's note: The author's original copy is about Paramount+ in the US. As our IP address is unable to hook to the US embedded video, the text seems moot. Good thing that Paramount has some sense (of humour) as it has a UK & Ireland version that we can watch. Fittingly enough, it begins with "Meanwhile, on the other side of Paramount Mountain...")]
Tina Fey sends body doubles out into the world to check out hotels for her in person. That would be a cool service in real life if it was offered, but the ad does give us cameos from Jane Krakowski, Jack McBrayer, and Glenn Close.
Aubrey Plaza rides a dragon in the new Mountain Dew Baja Blast ad. [Editor's note: And she gets to use her trademark deadpan in all sorts of situations, which include riding on a dragon.]
Jeremy Renner sings "I Got You (I Feel Good)" in this ad for Silk almond milk alongside his daughter, where he throws a wooden spoon so hard that it goes through the carton. I just want him to bring the Jeremy Renner app back.
"Ironically, it is the cold brew that births the fire-breathing dragon," says Anthony Hopkins in the new STōK ad. He's getting ready for his toughest role yet: Wrex the Dragon, the soccer team mascot from Welcome to Rexham.
What if a horse and a dog were friends? That's the question Budweiser has asked for years at the Super Bowl, and it's always been charming.
I'll take any excuse to see Ronald Gladden on my television again, even if it's in a cosmetics ad for the big game.
Ken Jeong is unfrozen in time in a world that apparently had never invented the chicken wing. Crazy! That's even worse than that Everything Everywhere All at Once reality where everyone has hot dog fingers.
In one of the most mysterious ads for the event, Addison Rae is teaching somehow to dance while eating NERDS. Who could it be? A nerd, perhaps?
I wouldn't recommend drinking beer before running a marathon, but somehow I believe that if anyone could do it, it would be Rob Riggle.
Yup, you read that right. Kawasaki has an ad this year where coming in contact with their new Ridge off-roader gives you a mullet instantly, even if you're an eagle or a bear.
There's a lot going on in this one—even aside from the all-caps "MY DAD HAD A ROLLS ROYCE" shirt. The whole bit is a play on the viral scene from Netflix's Beckham, where David made Victoria concede that she did not grow up in a working-class family. Now, they've forgotten what sport their big commercial is for. Baseball? Hockey? Either way, Jessica, er... Jennifer Aniston will be there, too.
Who earned Chris Pratt the big bucks? Mario, Garfield, or Mr. Pringle?
I can't tell if Post Malone is just at a party where everyone has Bud Light, or if he's also an anthropomorphic beer bottle with arms and a head sticking out of that limo. Either way, Posty is also singing "America the Beautiful" before kickoff.
Finally, the Doritos ad! Looks like the chips nabbed Jenna Ortega this year for their new flavor, "Dinamita." Hold on while I try to guess what "Dinamita" tastes like.
Messi, Sudeikis, and Marino are simply having a great time on the beach together, drinking Michelob ULTRA. Solid.
We have a new Hellman's mascot: Mayo Cat. The gist? The cat says "Mayo" and not "Meow." And that's how a star is born.
PSA: M&M's is planning to crush peanut butter into a diamond—you know, to make a Super Bowl ring. It'll bring comfort to almost-champions like Marino, who never won the real thing on the big day. Perfect. Great idea. I want one, too.
"We're three great athletes" Vaughn jokes, before Brady mentions that the actor tripped just walking into the room. I'd bet that this trio has more quips saved for the big game. (Sorry.)
Drumstick's first-ever Super Bowl ad will see the TSA confiscating Eric André's ice cream. There's also a little guy named Dr. Umstick involved... somehow.
Arnett has long been the voice of Reese's, but now the chocolate and peanut butter candy is making a "big change" on game day.
Ice Spice is pretty worried about running into her ex at a bar. Hopefully, it's not the Starry mascot from last year, which was slurped up by Keke Palmer.
Red Alert! Kris Jenner is stacking Oreo's on top of each other.
Arnold Schwarzenegger plays Agent State Farm in a Marvel-esque action film that I hope is someday made into a full movie.
