Netflix shows have a certain look. I can guarantee I’m not the only one who’s noticed—but if you haven’t, hear me out. There’s a striking sameness to the streaming service’s offerings, making everything from Wednesday to Cobra Kai look like a Hallmark Christmas movie produced by The CW. Is it an intentional branding statement by Netflix? I’m not sure. I can’t tell you why 3 Body Problem seemingly shares costumes with Avatar: The Last Airbender, why One Piece looks like the Bridgertons with newly developed superpowers, or why you could absolutely convince me that the Love Is Blind pods are placed just a room away from Squid Game’s glass bridge.
And yet, with each and every debilitating binge, I find myself learning more about Netflix’s bizarre visual language. The streamer makes a point of putting every character in the brightest room imaginable. It’s more willing to throw questionably awful CGI at me than to simply film outside, and it really wants to ensure that my eyes are constantly assaulted by a kaleidoscope of colour. Choices! They were made.
But what is Netflix’s visual oeuvre, exactly? I’ve assembled a few of Netflix’s most glaring quirks below, which you’ve probably noticed as well. And if Bobby from Queer Eye designed every damn set himself, it wouldn’t surprise me either.
You can’t convince me that Love Is Blind and Squid Game don’t share a set.
(NETFLIX)
I can only describe the brightness level of a Netflix show like this: You know that Hinge guy who keeps the big dentist lights on in his apartment instead of buying a ten-dollar lamp from Ikea? That’s where Netflix lives. Someone in the C-suite must’ve watched that House of the Dragon darkness controversy go down and said, That’s never happening here! Even in a joint as dark as The Witcher’s candle-lit castle halls, I can still see the reflection of a beaming white light on Henry Cavill’s (soon to be one of the Hemsworths’) face. I’ll bet it helps the woman I saw watching The Gray Man on her phone on the subway this week, but I pray these actors don’t go blind on set.
This is the face I’d make if The Circle assigned me this room.
(NETFLIX)
I wouldn’t be watching a Netflix show if, at the end of an episode, I didn’t feel like Van Gogh had tried to paint my Roku. That decor on The Circle? Oof. If I had to spend a month locked in a hotel room with a Pink Lemonade Jungle theme, I’d go insane. (Here’s a drinking game! Have a single beer and try to figure out if you’re watching Emily in Paris or The Ultimatum.) But hey, nothing is more memeable than Netflix.
Sorry, I just had to show you another hideous room from The Circle.
(NETFLIX)
With each new show, it’s more and more obvious to me where a Netflix set ends and the green screen begins. Remember that room on Squid Game where they cut the cookies? Nothing else should make me feel like I’m back in that space, yet 3 Body Problem’s virtual-reality world is giving off major Dalgona Room vibes. Even when the characters are supposed to be outside, it still feels painfully obvious that I haven’t even left whatever soundstage Netflix rented for the month. I shouldn’t question anything’s realness unless I’m watching Is It Cake?
It couldn’t be any more obvious where the wall begins on 3 Body Problem.
(NETFLIX)
Quick, someone try to walk up those totally real stairs.
(NETFLIX)
Don’t tell me...it’s right behind me, isn’t it?
(NETFLIX)
My last example is a phenomenon I call “But What Does My Favourite Character Think?” This moment usually occurs after a shocking reveal, when everyone crowds into the frame and shares a big ol’ confused look. There’s a chance that any character on the show could be your favourite! So Netflix needs to make sure that you know how they feel about what’s going on as well. What if too many people are in one shot? That’s fine, too. Just have them line up in a row. Cobra Kai is notorious for this—even if there’s a campiness to these moments that sometimes win me over.
A classic Cobrai Kai line-up.
(NETFLIX)
Don’t move on with the plot until I see what my favourite character thought of what just happened.
(NETFLIX)
Make sure I can see everyone’s face as if they were standing for a photograph.
(NETFLIX)
The most important thing to remember is that these decisions are not that bad. I’m just lovingly ribbing the streamer. There are shows and original movies on Netflix that are actually a fit for this aesthetic. Bridgerton, for example, probably looks exactly the way it should. And after I conditioned my brain against change over several seasons, the Love Is Blind pods started looking normal to me. But not everything needs to look like this! Sooner or later, I might start thinking Wednesday Addams is on Stranger Things.
Originally published on Esquire US
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